“Someone’s coming” Grumpy whispered over his shoulder as he hefted his axe and prepared himself for combat. He relaxed as he recognised Llona making her way stealthily down the corridor towards the entrance that he was guarding.
Taking their cue from the Dwarf the other three members of the party lowered their weapons and waited for the Rogue to enter the door.
“Did you find her?” asked Slobba as soon as Llona had stepped into the room.
“No” came the angry reply “she found me.”
“Praise be to Mighty Thor” said Slobba “that is good news indeed.”
“Praise be to Mighty Thor” said Slobba “that is good news indeed.”
“She’s about 100 feet down the corridor. Just beyond that there is a room off to the left with what looks to be 2 wizards in it. Going by what we’ve encountered thus far I’d say that there is a better than average chance that they will want to kill us” said the female Elf. “Alyse wants us to get up to her as quickly and as quietly as possible” she concluded.
“That’ll be easy” said the big Lorsian “I can cast a spell that will mask our sounds so they won’t hear us coming.”
“But if you do that then we won’t be able to cast our own spells” said Shyne with a worried expression on his face.
“I won’t be able to inspire you with my heroic songs either” said Elvis as he shook one of his maracas as if to remind them all that he was a Bard.
“I shall banish the spell once we charge our foes” said Slobba with a shrug of his shoulders “with a bit of luck we’ll be on them before they know what’s going on.”
“It’s a grand plan that can’t possibly fail!” exclaimed the Bard enthusiastically. “Unless Shyne’s involved of course, then we’ll most likely be captured, brutally tortured and killed with a coconut.”
“How do you kill someone with a coconut?” asked Slobba.
“You don’t want to know” replied the Bard with a faraway look on his face as he noticeably clenched his buttocks.
“You know Elvis, sometimes you can be a real bastard” said Shyne contemptuously.
“Yeah” sighed the Bard “I know.”
“Ok everyone gather around me” said Slobba “I’m going to cast the Silence spell.”
“What?”
“Stop being a smart arse Grumpy, just get over here” said the Cleric.
“Nice one Grumps” laughed Elvis.
“Don’t encourage him” snapped Slobba. “Right, everyone ready? Good. Here goes” said the Cleric before launching into an incomprehensible incantation that ended with all sound in the room disappearing.
Slobba tapped the Dwarf on the shoulder and motioned for him to start moving down the corridor. He then waved first Llona, then Shyne, through next before he himself stepped through the door with Elvis a few paces behind him.
Even though the party was unnaturally quite they still moved slowly along the passageway towards the waiting Alyse.
As they neared the open doorway, the Ranger stepped out of the shadows and motioned for the group first to stop, then to move up against the wall so that they couldn’t be seen from the inside.
Slobba slowly made his way over to Alyse and raised an eyebrow while nodding in the direction of the room that was no more than 20 feet from where they were standing.
Alyse raised two fingers on her left hand, shrugged her shoulders then raised three fingers on her left hand once again. She then made the shape of an ‘L’ on her forehead with the finger and thumb of her right.
‘So we have at least two and possibly three Wizards in the room. This could get tricky’ Slobba thought to himself, before turning and slowly making his way with Alyse back to the party.
Once everyone was back together he pointed at Grumpy and Llona then motioned for them to take the left hand side of the room. He then pointed at Alyse then himself and gestured towards the right, before finally motioning for Elvis and Shyne to go up the centre.
Once he was sure that everyone knew their roles he turned and slowly made his way back to the edge of the doorway.
Elvis watched as Shyne reached out his hand to give Llona a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. Even though the female Elf gave him a glare in response, the Bard was sure that he saw the ghost of a smile flicker across her lips after Shyne had turned away.
It was only the silence spell that prevented everyone from hearing the retching sounds that Elvis made after watching the exchange.
The Bard was quickly brought to his senses when Slobba suddenly charged through the door with the rest of the party in tow. He hoisted his rapier in his right hand and his maracas in his left and followed his friends into uncertainty.
The room was roughly 30 feet by 30 feet in size and was richly furnished. There were two beds with wooden chests alongside them at opposite ends with a door in the middle of the far wall, and the floor was covered in a heavy dark red carpet. The walls were lined with large tapestries depicting a mixture of landscape and city scenes.
As per the plan, Slobba had burst into the room and headed to the right, with Llona two paces behind. Before him stood a golden haired female Elven Wizard dressed in green trousers with knee high brown boots, and a dark blue tabard with a light blue border. She was staring at him with her mouth open in astonishment.
The hulking Lorsian raised his spear and levelled it with the tip inches from her throat and, with barely a thought, he ended the silence spell.
“Do not move or I shall kill you” he said in a menacing tone as Llona manoeuvred into a flanking position.
Across the other side of the room Grumpy and Alyse were confronted by a bald human male clad in a blue tunic and knee high brown boots. He had a long beard that was plaited down to below his waist and blue lightning bolts tattooed on his arms and skull.
With a look of pure malice in his eyes the Wizard began to cast a spell. Seeing the danger, Alyse brought her bow to bear and loosed an arrow, but her aim was off and it sailed harmlessly past the gesticulating man.
Grumpy lowered his head and started to rush at the Wizard, but he knew that he would not get to him in time to stop the spell. The Dwarf watched in alarm as the man’s arm came up until his finger was pointed directly at his heart. It seemed to the Dwarf that time itself stood still as he watched in morbid fascination as little balls of light crackled up and down the Wizards wrist, before a bolt of lightning seemed to lazily erupt from his hand and streak towards him.
“Clanggedin Titty-Fucking Silverbeard!” he shouted at the top of his lungs as he threw his body to the side and avoided most of the force of the lightning bolt.
As he lay writhing on the ground Grumpy could hear Alyses shrieks of agony and he realised that she must have also been hit.
“DON’T DO IT!” Slobba shouted to the female Elf as she took a step back and began to cast a spell. An instant later 2 glowing balls of energy exploded from her hand and flew unerringly into him.
Slobba gritted his teeth against the pain and thrust his long spear into her neck. The Elf’s eyes opened wide in pain and shock as blood fountained from the hideous wound in her throat.
With a snarl of rage Llona leapt forward and buried one of her shortswords into the Wizards side. Knowing that the wound was fatal she spun on the balls of her feet to search for her next opponent, just in time to see Shyne send a magical acid arrow into the bald human on the other side of the room.
No sooner had the arrow struck home and catapulted the Wizard into the wall, than the door on the far wall burst open and four armoured men charged into the room.
Slobba turned to meet the new threat and at the top of his lungs bellowed “BY THOR CUM IN ME’ ASS!” before charging into the fray.
“What did he just say?” Elvis asked Shyne incredulously.
“By Thor come and meet us. What are you deaf?” replied the Elf before casting another spell that sent 2 glowing balls of energy into the closest warrior. “If you’ve got an inspiring song to sing you’d best do it now, things are starting to get a little out of hand here.”
“Oh I’ve got a song alright” said Elvis with a wicked grin on his face and he launched right into it.
Give it to me Llona, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to me Llona, uh huh, uh huh
Give it to me Llona, uh huh, uh huh
And all the girlies say Shynes pretty thick for a dumb prick
You know it’s kinda hard for Elves to get along today
Now Shyne he isn’t smart he couldn’t fake it no way!
He doesn’t have a clue and he doesn’t have style
In fact he’s got a face that looks like a vertical smile!
“You know you’re not helping!” shouted Slobba as he ducked under a vicious swing from the sword of one of the warriors that he was facing.
“Of course I am” retorted the Bard “it’s called reverse psychology”.
"I'll give you fucking reverse psychology after all this is over!" shouted Shyne as he drew his great sword from its sheath and parried the attack of another opponent.
“And all the girlies say Shynes pretty slick for a fat prick!”
“SHUT UP!”
Continued in Part 2
Authors Note 1: I thought I'd take a minute to explain Slobba's war cry. Lenny, my mate who runs Slobba, likes to put a bit of depth into his characters and early on he decided that Slobba would be a Viking. As such he likes to occasionally speak in a bit of a Scandinavian accent. On this one particular night when we were confronted by some baddies he said 'By Thor, come and meet us!' but with the accent that he put on it sounded to me like he'd said 'By Thor cum in me ass!' In all my years playing DnD (over 25) I have never laughed so much at a game. I was literally doubled over and crying with laughter (and so was Lenny once he found out what I thought he'd said). Truly one of my all time favourite gaming memories.
Authors Note 2: Clangeddin Silverbeard is the Dwarven God of battle.
Prux
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